Photo via: thederniercri.net
I couldn’t stop gazing in the mirror smiling and posing as I
took air pictures of myself like paparazzi. “Damn girl,” I said to my
reflection as I twirled around in what I thought was the most stylistic sun
dress I’d ever seen. It was knee-length, black and white with red, orange and
yellow flowers that meandered at an angle from just above my knee to my
abdomen. It’s silk fabric hugged all of my curves the right way but had a just
enough of a flare that kept me feeling like a lady. I loved the way it made me
feel and just as I was about to spend yet another minute engorged in my own
vanity, reality sunk in. I may have looked beautiful on the outside but on the
inside I felt like shit.
“Fuck,” I murmured under my breath. I’m an ass hole,”.
Three months earlier
I hated my computer science class my senior year in high
school. Initially I’d picked up the elective as an alternative to enduring the
mundane silence and boredom of back-to-back study halls. I quickly regretted my
decision when I realized the amount of effort this class demanded though. And yes, I was lazy, but I figured I’d earned
the right to be after surviving the previous 3 years as an underclassman. Besides,
I was 18-years-old and grown (or so I thought) with a vanishing attention span
that seemed to shorten daily.
By the second week of my senior year the honeymoon was over
and I made the decision to only focus on the classes that would determine if I
walked across the stage or not, (i.e. AP English and History) and any
additional classes that didn’t quite make the cut usually just became physical
holding places for my body while my mind roamed in and out of consciousness.
I’d even resorted to skipping on most days, which eventually
resulted in me receiving several demerits (Chaney High School’s attempt to
remix detentions) and the threat of suspension so I was forced to spend 45
minutes in third period pretending to give an ounce of a shit. On most days I tried
not to be seen and prayed my teacher would take heed to my
please-do-not-call-on-me face. It was a
pretty good formula that actually kept me out of trouble until some new kid
Jester came to class.
He was overly outspoken, obnoxious, rude and got on my
absolute last nerve. I saw him donate his unsolicited two cents to our
classmates while I sat in silence thinking, “I wish he would,”. Unfortunately I got what I asked for when he
decided to make a spectacle of himself by interrupting me during my presentation.
I can’t recall exactly what initiated the argument, but I do remember the two of
us yelling and screaming at each other like we were on the streets. It got so
heated that my teacher had to step in.
“You two better stop it or I’m sending you both to the
office,” she said.
I contemplated taking the risk and explaining myself to the
principal but instead I just sat down. “I’ll get his ass in the hallway,” I
thought.
Just as the bell rang I scurried to get out of the door
ready to finish letting this vile disrespectful ingrate have it when I saw him
greet an old friend of mine.
“What up Chance,” I said.
“Hey Eartha long time no see,” he replied.
‘Wait. Hold up. You know her?” Jester asked while he stood
in the hallway with this puzzled ugly look on his face.
“Don’t get cussed out again. I already don’t like you and we
can go right here right now,” I said as I rolled my eyes.
“What’s up with y’all? Y’all don’t like each other?” Chance
inquired with a slight grin on his face.
“Hell NO!” we said in unison but not at all planned.
“Look it was good seeing you Chance but ya boy is an idiot
and he needs his ass beat. If I was a nigga, I’d do it with pleasure. I got to
get to class though so I see you around,” I said while glaring at Jester with
an eye that read nigga-please-don’t-test-me.
I turned my back so fast that Jester didn’t have the chance
to respond. Everything I said was true. He was an arrogant son of a bitch and
for him to have the audacity to interrupt me during my presentation really
pissed me off. The only thing worse than having to spend the next couple of
months in this God awful class that I hated, was having to also share space
with such a repulsive asshole. I was highly annoyed.
I couldn’t concentrate at all in my fourth-period class.
Jester had really gotten under my skin but it was actually good to see Chance.
Chance (CR) Ryle was a brown-skin kid with a low-cut fade
and dark brown eyes that were easily hidden underneath his squinty lids. He was
considerably short by high-school-boy standards. I mean, so short that if he
and I stood face-to-face we could make direct eye contact and I was and still
am 5 foot 2 inches tall. He was quiet and kept such a low profile that, to be
quite honest, up until our now, I thought he’d moved away. He didn’t play
football, basketball or participate in any traditional extracurricular
activities that would indicate his status, which meant he and I never crossed
paths. Even his walk was easily forgettable. The only reason that I knew of his
existence was due to the fact that he and I had attended Volney Rodgers Junior
High School together and he’d had a small crush on me in the eighth-grade.
I really didn’t know CR that well but from what I could
recall in junior high, he was such a sweet person. So sweet that it was
actually quite surprising that he was friends with this fool. “Maybe they were just alike. Nah,” I thought.
“Wait why do I even care?” I questioned myself.
The next day in third period I tried my best to ignore
Jester but for some odd reason he kept staring at me. I wanted to ask him WTF was
he looking at but I didn’t need to get sent to the office. I was still in hot
water about skipping class these last couple of weeks so I tried my best to do
my work while he burned a hole in the side of my face from across the room. Seconds
later he was right by my desk.
“Dude, whatever you about to say I really don’t want to hear
it. I’m not trying to go there with you today so just leave me alone,” I said
without lifting my head from my book.
“Oh it’s like that? You ain’t even heard what I had to say
though,” Jester said with a slight snicker.
“Like seriously? Was he trying to push up on me? And if so,
I hope he wasn’t those reverse-psychology-type of dudes. You know the the type
of guy that still treated girls that he was interested in like crap as if we
were back on the playground? I know boys matured slower than females, but that
was ridiculous. And even if he was trying to get on he was going to get nowhere
with me. He was not my type at all. I was into the tall, dark (well actually so
black that they look blue) and handsome guys, and he was far to fair skinned
and not athletic at all but I had no intention on doing this assignment for
this class so I decided to humor him.
“What do you want?” I asked.
“So you and CR are kind of cool huh?” He asked.
“ I guess. Why?”
“Well that’s my friend and he told me that y’all been
knowing each other since back in the day like in junior high or somethin,”.
“Umm well yea we both did go to Volney back in the day but
we ain’t all that cool. Matter of fact, that was my first time seeing him in
years yesterday after class for real”.
“Well he told me he kind of had a thing for you back in the
day”.
I laughed. “A thing for me? What’s a thing for me?” I asked.
“You know he liked you Eartha”.
Who was I kidding? I knew exactly what Jester meant when he
said CR had a thing for me. I just liked the ring of it.
“I mean, yea I guess but we were kids who didn’t like each
other back then? I said smiling and gushing with pride.
“Well what about now?”
“What do you mean?” I asked.
“What if he still has a thing for you right now?”
“Man get out of here dude,” I said laughing.
“I’m serious,” Jester said with a stern face.
“Oh you for real huh? Well I don’t know what I would say to
be honest. Does he like me?”
“You think I be over here talkin to you after what happened
yesterday if he didn’t?”
We both broke out into a burst of laughs.
“Well you got a point there,” I said.
“He asked me to get yo number for him,” Jester said.
I quickly scrunched my face.
“He is really shy Eartha,” he replied intuitively.
“Well, he gone have to ask me himself,” I said.
“What’s the difference in you just giving it to me now and
him asking? He still gone get it regardless,”.
I had a rebuttal. I had a great rebuttal in fact, but I
didn’t care to put up a fight. If CR went through all this to get the digits then
I figured why not.
“Yea OK. It’s 3-3-0-5-#-#-#-#”.
“Good lookin and I’ll make sure he calls you today,” Jester
said.
“Yea you do that,” I replied.
Jester went back to his seat but I couldn’t help but feel
bad. I was currently juggling a couple of situations (if you catch my drift)
and I wasn’t sure if I had room for CR, but then again…………
