Mr. and Mrs. Pt.4: Reminiscing

Thump. Thump. Thump. My foot tapped on Ce Ce’s sandy- colored hardwood floor. I chewed on the top of a black pen, while I sat glaring at her Dell computer screen contemplating what I was before my eyes.

“Can we still be friends,”? I read in my head.

I thought about deleting the message without reading it. Mister was the most bold and arrogant he had ever been. I couldn’t believe he had the nerve to even contact me, let alone ask such a ridiculous question, after he watched me lay down every ounce of myself to him. I showed every emotion brewing within my soul in that driveway the night before, and he was silent, but now he wanted to communicate over the internet. Now the words that had temporary paralyzed his tongue had mysteriously resurfaced, and he was compelled to tell me something that was supposed to ease my troubles.

My integrity, pride and self –will and esteem were all forfeited about six months after the basement party incident. I had nothing left, but an aching, yet dull pain that lay dormant until I saw him and her together. He’d taken me way past embarrassment and way past anger. I was lost. I figured I had nothing to lose or gain. He couldn’t take anything that he hadn’t already robbed me of. I was working off of pure curiosity so I decided to just opened the message.

Can we still be cool? We dun been through too much, and I’ve known you for too long. We always been cool, and don’t listen to your friends ‘cause I know they all in your ear.

The only thing I was grateful for was that he hadn’t apologized. For some odd reason that is what stood out the most in my mind. I was just happy that he didn’t apologize for doing what he always wanted to anyways. The message was already an insult, in itself, but an apology might have driven me to show up to his house, and wreak havoc.

Ce Ce was on the opposite side of her room talking to one of her many suitors. Everyone knew she had a main, yet boys lined up to play boyfriend No. 2 for her like it was a badge of honor. I didn’t know what drug she was selling to these teen-aged junkies, but I know I wanted whatever she had

 “So Mister wanna know if we can still be friends Ce Ce,”. I said.

“What,”? She yelped.

“He just sent me a message asking if we could still be friends because we have been through too much,”. I explained.

“Is this fool out of his damn mind? He gone play you for that bucket-head greyhound dog lookin chic, and then ask can we still be friends”? She questioned.

“I don’t know,”. I said. “I can’t believe he would just come at me like that,”.

“Be friends. Be friends. Ain’t nobody trying to be his friend,”. I said.

“Right. Because if he sure didn’t look like he was ya friend last night,”. She said.” Standin there lookin stupid as hell,”.

Mister was right though. We had been through a lot together. Things were clearly not good at this point, but I had fallen for the better half of him, and although he had morphed into a professional moronic narcissistic ass hole, somehow I couldn’t forget about those better days.  I couldn’t help, but reminisce about when he used to call me every night. I missed the charming mister, who almost broke his neck running to me after he caught me crying in senior home room. I wanted to get to know the dude with the sense of humor, who met me in between classes in the hallways to cuddle. I missed that guy, and I was desperately wishing for his return to glory.

Smack! My day dreams were interrupted as I fell to the floor. Ce Ce’s computer chair was a dinky unreliable appliance that I warned her would hurt someone one day. Of course, that person had to be me.

Ce Ce laughed at me, and dammit I had to laugh at myself too. My only alternative on the eve of such a horrible night  was to cry.

“Throw that damn chair away,”. I said. I dusted myself off and sat on her bed.

“What I tell you last time you said that? I will, as soon as you give me the money to buy a new one,”. Ce Ce said.

We laughed. We talked, and I tried to keep my mind off Mister. He had taken more of my time and energy than I would have liked these past two days, and I needed a break for a second to rejuvenate myself. I needed a distraction, and lord knows my best friend was great in that area.

 I was going to write Mister back, but he would have to wait until I felt like it. It wasn’t like I didn’t have plenty of others I could have pursued. I needed to dust off that black book. It was time to go to work.